vent

It is 3 in the morning and at this very moment I wish I could just sleep. 8 blissful, uninterrupted hours of sleep is non existent in my world. Nobody warned me about how bad sleep deprivation is. The days just run into each other, and most mornings I feel like there in no such thing as yesterday because my days never stop. They just go and go and go.... with no break. This three kids under two thing seriously is hard. I do NOT recommend it to anyone. I have never been more challenged in my entire life.  Most days I seriously feel like I am going crazy. Someone is always crying, or upset. I feel like the energizer bunny, I keep going and going and going... but with no energy. I hope this gets easier. In  a lot of respects it has gotten easier, but I need it to be a lot easier than it is right now. Some days I wish I could just hop in the car and go to Target, or eat all of my lunch in one sitting, or read a book. Maybe one day, definitely not today though.. or tomorrow unfortunately. Don't get me wrong I am incredibly grateful for my children. I love them with every fiber of my being. BUT IT IS SO HARD SOMETIMES and some days I just don't know if I am cut out for all of this.  Tonight for example.. I have got up 4 times... and I am sitting here right now feeding Mac, who is sick and fussy and now hear Morgan crying too. I just don't know how one person is supposed to do this without loosing their mind.