How Things Do Change

  A Year ago this week Oscar and I had the biggest surprise of our lives.  We found out we were having twins! I remember having a strong feeling that we were having multiples and Oscar even had a dream we were having twins. I went in at 5 weeks because I was feeling so sick. I remember saying to the Nurse Practitioner that I thought it was twins. She said I was probably just having a boy, because I wasn't sick at all with Grace. I remember the instant she turned on the screen and seeing two big black sacks and knowing that there was indeed two. I gasped. She gasped. Oscar sat clueless. She said that I had really good intuition. I looked to Oscar and said "Oh my gosh.. I was right". The Nurse Practitioner proceeded to tell me that this was going to be a very different pregnancy than my first. I don't think I heard a word she said and in retrospect she was so right. My body was in for the toughest 9 months it had ever had. 

  When you find out you are pregnant the world stops. You know that you are now bigger than yourself. You are not just one anymore. Your life is no longer your own.  When you go through the pain of labor and are handed this tiny, precious, beautiful little creature... your world stops again.. or actual starts anew. When you are handed two.... it is indescribable. The first time I held both of my twins together they were 5 days old. It was the craziest thing in the world. I couldn't believe that not only did I have one beautiful little angel. I had TWO. 

  Looking back on this past year I can reflect on how much my world has changed. I never would have imagined that I would have three children right now. I am so glad that this past year is over. It was hard. It was exhausting. It literally pushed my to my physical, emotional and spiritual limits. I am so much stronger now. I am a better woman because of it. Because of this last year I have two more beautiful little spirits in my home and life. When I look at them I know that they were worth it. I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for giving me the gift of Motherhood. I have so many wonderful things in my life, but honestly being a Mother is the most special thing in the world. It is part of our divine nature. I know that. I am honored to be called of God to care for three of his special spirits. It humbles me to my very core to know the responsibilities that rest on my shoulder. I am glad to have them and try to do better each day. I love my children. I love my husband. I love my life.